100 Day Challenge – Day 3

Lately I have been struggling with the big “Why?” Why do godly people get hurt? Why do plans go awry? Why is there tension among the body of Christ? Why do we experience loss? Why does God give good things to people who don’t love Him and don’t want His gifts, but doesn’t give the same good things to people who do love Him and would cherish His gifts? It has been a struggle in which I’ve almost felt betrayed by God. The overwhelming question of “Why does God let bad things happen?”

In several conversations I’ve had lately I’ve been given little tidbits of wisdom, maybe even a couple of answers to my questions.  Why do godly people get hurt? Could it be that God is allowing this trial in their life to draw them closer to Himself. I think of Job and horrible turn his life took and yet in the midst of his desolation he was praising the Lord for the things he had already received.  And then there is the passage “All things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose”. It doesn’t say all things are good, but that all things work together for good.  Maybe God is allowing this trouble and will give them a testimony from it.

Why do plans go awry? Well, maybe God’s plan is better!  I’m learning that God knows me better than I know myself and maybe He doesn’t give me everything I want because He knows that’s not really what I need. (For I know the plans I have for you, plans to give you a hope and a future. – Jer. 29:11)

Why is there tension amongst the body of Christ? Maybe this is our God-given opportunity to learn and grow in unity by expressing humility.  Maybe this is our chance to take a step back and listen to one another and dive deep into what is causing the issue. I was fortunate to see this theory in action recently and man was it a blessing to see a disastrous situation turn into an edifying situation.

Why are gifts given where they aren’t wanted? Maybe it’s because God is going to use that gift to turn lives around. Maybe that gift is going to be such a huge blessing in that person’s life that they will never be the same. Maybe that gift is going to open new doors of opportunity. And really, maybe I just don’t need to know why that gift was given, because it’s not really any of my business.

Why do we experience loss? I don’t think there’s one good answer for any of these questions really, but the first thing that comes to mind for this is that in our suffering we can be a witness for Christ. In our pain we can be comfort to others walking our same path. So that we can learn not to rely on ourselves for our strength but to lean upon one who is greater. So we can stop with our busyness and thank God for the blessings we’ve received.

I’ve started a challenge. Air1 talked about doing a 100 day challenge and I decided to join them. Their only guideline was doing something purposefully every day for 100 days. I decided to keep a journal of gratefulness. I want to write at least one thing each day.  So I’m writing down things that I’m grateful for in that moment. Some are simple and even silly, but I believe the more I focus on having a thankful heart the happier I will be. How can my spirit not be encouraged when God is showing me His works in even the most minute way. I want to get away from asking God “why?” and get to a place of say “thanks for what I do have”.  I’m going to try to make Thursday the day I post about something I’ve been grateful for in the last week.  I welcome you to join me on this journey towards having a thankful heart.

Thanksgiving for Encouragement

Today really was incredible...We had a few visitors at church today, and being able to talk with all of them was so encouraging. One conversation particularly was encouraging. We've been discussing the gifts of the Holy Spirit in church lately, and a big one is prophecy, and I had a prophecy spoken over me today. I suppose you could also call it a word of knowledge. She spoke for several minutes about who I am and how God sees me. It was amazing because she named several specific things in my life that she wouldn't be able to know. That is one confirmation that God was speaking through her. She also spoke about me becoming involved in a ministry that I've truly had a heart for ever since I lived in Germany. She and her friend were so encouraging about my music and the part I play in the church. And they also explained to me what some of my gifts are. That may sound a little strange, but they were things I have felt I was good at and enjoyed, and God just confirmed that He has put those gifts in me. It is so encouraging to hear those wonderful things! What a blessing it was!

Thanksgiving Day

I wish I would be better about taking pictures, but my words will have to suffice. Thanksgiving was a wonderful day. I was able to sleep in for the first time in a long while and then talk with M as he drove home to be with his family. Once I got up and ready, I made my way over to M's aunt's house. As soon as I got there, I was able to play with M's cousin who is twelve. And to my surprise, found that I was actually enjoying that time spent with him without distraction. Helping out with lunch went very quickly, as most of it was already done, but I was able to learn some new things and try new things  that I really liked! We all came together to give thanks and share how God has blessed us over the past year. It is always a pleasure to hear and to see how God is moving, and to reflect on how He's changed my own life.  The meal was delicious, and the time spent was wonderful! Immediately after lunch, I went to play with the cousin again, who had put together and obstacle course for me! We were able to play together for a while and then I took a nap while he watched a movie. Shortly after that, I headed home after a great day with M's family. It was such a blessing to spend the day with people I already care so much about. It was a privilege to be counted among them.

Thanksgiving Month - The day before Thanksgiving

Well, it's no use pretending I've kept up with this. Lately I'm been super tired and busy and it just hasn't been the first thing on my mind. Despite the fact that I haven't posted every day, I do have several things I'm very grateful for...


"Count it all Joy"
 This is the book I'm reading right now, and I am incredibly thankful for it. It is written by my sister's midwife and it is about different birth stories and how she has continued to learn more about God throughout her journey as a midwife. It is a truly inspiring book and I have learned so much.

Friends
I've been so blessed with friends this last week who have been an encouragement. I've had a lot on my mind, and have had to make some bigger (and exciting decisions), and they were always there for me. I've been so blessed with my church family up here because they really are a family to me.

 Decisions
I've made several decisions this week. One big decision is still in the process of being confirmed, so I'll wait on that. I did decide that I will take the next semester off of school and perhaps take classes during the summer. I decided to devote more time to volunteering at the nursing home once school is over. And I decided that I should get a second job as well...which leads me to...

Mary Kay
I just made this decision tonight, and so I personally am still processing this, but I'm super excited! I am now a Mary Kay Consultant! I learned about the opportunity a few months ago but determined it wasn't the right time, but that I was interested in the idea. I let the idea sit on the back burner until my consultant (and friend) brought it up to me again just last week. It was just the perfect timing for me to get excited about it. I'm very excited to get started, though a bit nervous. God is good. He will help me do my best.

Thanksgiving
I was anticipating this being another holiday spent alone, and I did not like that idea. I am way too much a people person and can easily get depressed if I don't see people for a while. Then as I was working, I had a brilliant  thought: I asked M's aunt if I could have Thanksgiving with her family! She very willingly said I could, and I'm just so excited about that. Not only will I spend Thanksgiving with people, but people I love to be around. What a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving Month - Day Twelve

Today was another fabulous day! Work was just fine, and it was a nice pace throughout the day. I had a chiropractic appointment that went very well, and it was more fun than usual! We laughed during my entire appointment! I was able to meet my awesome boyfriend for a short while and it was quite nice. Then I was able to hang out with a really good friend and hear the latest in her life. The night concluded with having small group, which was very good and thought provoking. It was a day that just kept going and going, but it was full of happy moments and lots of laughter. I'm one very blessed girl.

Thanksgiving Month - A Blessed Day Eleven

Today was such a wonderful day! Wednesday is my favorite day of the week. I always work Wednesday mornings and I absolutely love them, because it is Wednesday mornings that the ladies from the church's Bible study come beforehand for coffee and cookies. It is most definitely the busiest morning of the week. I have so enjoyed getting to know these wonderful women, and they have been an unending source of encouragement to me. I don't see them beyond the cafe, but yet we keep in touch with each others lives. Every week we get the update and share what is new in our own lives. It is wonderful, and to think I met them just because of where I work. I loves ladies, so I love Wednesdays. Today was especially busy! We had several large orders to take care of, on top of the even larger than normal Wednesday crowd. It was so much fun. I felt so accomplished by the end of my shift.

Another huge blessing from today was visiting M's aunt and uncle who live near by. M's sister came up for the night, so we had a small dinner party. It was great having time to get to know her a little bit more and hang out with his aunt. It's always such a blessing to spend time with their family.

Then immediately after that, M and I had music practice for church, which is, of course, another highlight of my Wednesdays. Music is so important to me, and I love having the chance to enjoy making music with my friends. It is a fabulous time of worship and thanks giving. Ahh, I love it.

It was such a wonderfully blessed day.

Thanksgiving Month - Day Ten

Today was pretty good, though not too exciting. The most exciting thing I did was dye my hair! It's now a reddish brown, and I really like it! :D I'm super thankful for my friend who helped me take care of it. I was really nervous even thinking about doing it on my own, so I was very willing to accept help. Then her husband started helping me look for apartments! Another huge blessing! I even was provided with supper from my job, and it was delicious!! I don't have any complaints for the day, only contentedness.

Thanksgiving Month - An interesting (9th) day!

Today was very interesting indeed! I went to work at 11 while it was raining huge raindrops. Those raindrops turned into the biggest snowflakes I think I've ever seen. Everything at my job were going normally and it was a regular busyness. Then at about noon, the lights flickered off for a few seconds. The place was full and dead silent until the lights came back on. We went back to life as usual. Just a few minutes later the lights went out again for real. The place was still pretty full, and we had a couple orders still to make, but we worked that out. We used candles wherever they were necessary. Our customers just hung out and finished their meals like nothing had happened, when it actuality, nearly the entire city and many surrounding towns were experiencing the power outage. It was determined that the power may not be on for quite a while, so we proceeded to close down shop, and just when we were about finished, the power came on. At first it was excited, then it was disappointing (I wanted to go home and do homework =P), then it was just strange. The rest of the day really felt off. The best moment at work was when M surprised me by coming in and hanging out a bit. I love when he does that. Over all, it was a very odd, but good, day at work. God reminded me just how much I love my job, and that alone makes me very thankful.

Thanksgiving Month - Day Eight

Today was a wonderful day all around though not much actually happened. I drove back from my sister's house today and it's about a 5 1/2 hr drive. One of my favorite parts was the fact that I left earlier than my boyfriend, and I was able to surprise him! I don't accomplish surprises very well, so I was ecstatic to pull it off. I did manage to completely freak him out for a minute as well. It was just lovely to have time hanging out with him (and his roommate) after having such a busy week. I'm thankful for quality time. :)

Thanksgiving Month - Day Seven

Yesterday was so wonderful being able to feel the baby move, but today was even better. I was able to be there for my sister's midwife appointment, and the midwife taught me how to feel the different parts of the baby. I could actually feel the baby's back, head, and butt! It was incredible. You always know that there is a baby inside there, but actually feeling it was amazing. Such a blessing. Another thing I'd like to share is a half hour video that I found particularly powerful. I'm thankful for the miracles of God and for people who are courageous enough to stand up for them.

Thanksgiving Month - Day Six

I'm so happy I was able to get this weekend off from work! I successfully flew down to Iowa this morning! (Phew, my arms are tired) After hanging out at home a little bit, my dad and I went to eat Chinese food at our favorite restaurant, and it was delicious. Then I made the short trip to my sister's abode where I am residing for the weekend. We spent our day together painting finishing touch-ups in her house. I've always enjoyed painting. The best part of the day was definitely feeling the little baby growing inside of her. What a blessing to be a woman! God's gift of life is awe-inspiring and should never be forgotten. I'm so incredibly thankful for God's grace in providing my sister and brother-in-law with an addition to their family, and for the chance to hang out with them a bit.

Thanksgiving Month - Day Five

Something I am in the process of doing is displaying my photography at Josie's, where I work. Of course, my preferred result would be to sell them, but that hasn't happened much yet. That has gotten a bit discouraging at times. I really want my work to be appreciated for what it is. I have received many compliments on them, which helps, but no one has liked them well enough to buy one except for one co-worker. One exciting thing about this experience has been ordering my first business cards ever! I really love them, and just think they are beautiful. Well, my thankful thought for the day comes from that. I looked at work today and a large chunk of my business cards were gone! I know that doesn't necessarily translate into purchases, but that means that each person was impressed even to take a card. It's a simple one tonight, but it meant a lot to me.

Thanksgiving Month - Day Four

The last few days have been very difficult on me, to be honest. I've been dealing with a lot of physical pain and a large amount of stress with school. My biggest area of thankfulness is that I finally finished my term paper, and it is in, though it is not my best paper ever. It is such a relief not to think about it. I've come to terms that I won't get a super high score, but at least I will get some credit. I've also had to correct some mistakes in another class that made me very anxious, but I'm learning not to take myself too seriously. Now, my body is yelling at me to get some sleep. So yeah, I'm so thankful to have those big assignments taken care of.

Thanksgiving Month - Day Three

I only have a minute before I simply crash into bed and fall asleep, but I didn't want to forget my thankful post. I'm thankful for friends who are there for me when I have a discouraging day. I am thankful for friends who can give me a different perspective. I'm thankful for friend who have experience writing term papers. And I'm thankful for their tips and help during the very stressful time of writing my own term paper. With that said, I'm going to fall asleep in about two minutes. G'night world!

Thanksgiving Month - Day Two

Right now it would be easy to think about all the things in my life that was making me anxious and frustrated, so just taking this minute to remember what I'm grateful for is very important.

I've mentioned this many times before, but I'm incredibly thankful for my job. I found the perfect little place to work the day after moving to this town. It has been the source of so many blessings. My focus tonight is definitely food blessings. Whenever I'm around when they have to dump food, I always am allowed to take it home and eat it up before it goes bad. With the combination of working there every day during the lunch hour and the food they send home with me, my grocery bill is nearly cut in half! Saving money is a very big deal in my life right now as I am just now searching for a place to live. Every dollar I can save instead of buying food goes into my savings account for a day when I won't be able to work. Basically, I've been hugely blessed.

Thanksgiving Month - Ron Paul

Last November, I was able to join with other bloggers in writing every day about what we were thankful for. I hadn't thought about it until just now, and though I am getting a late start on it, I decided I would like to do it again this year, even though not everyone else is. Anyway, I feel an attitude of thankfulness is a very important thing that many in my generation has lost, and I don't want to fall into that, so I'm back to this being a blog of thanksgiving.

For my first day it is very easy. I am extremely thankful for the opportunity I had yesterday to meet Presidential candidate, Ron Paul. He is a man to be admired for sure. He knows what he believes in and sticks to it no matter what other people say. I was privileged to not only get a group photo and a handshake, but also an individual picture and an autographed book. Though he had little time to be with us, it was wonderful to hear him speak on the policies he would enforce as the President. And he spoke to us on the very basic principles of freedom that we have lost. It was a very encouraging speech, and I learned a lot from it. So, I'm very thankful not only that I was able to meet him, but that there is such a man running for the highest position in our nation, and I hope that you, my friends, will look into him and realize just how awesome he is!

Thankful Thursday - Lessons Learned

The day I walked into the nursing home to volunteer, I knew it would be hard, and I knew it would change me, but I never realized how much. My very first day I had to deal with something that nearly made me physically sick, and though it seems minuscule to me to now, it actually made me choose not to return and visit a resident. I am not proud of this. I found out recently that this certain resident passed away. I still feel guilty. I feel very guilty because I was weak, and I didn't allow myself to be a blessing. *sigh* But God has more in store for me.

I have had to deal with residents who are very bitter and depressed, some who are always angry. I have had to listen to stories and not know the truth in them. It is extraordinarily hard for me to find myself doubting what I'm hearing, but I do..sometimes I have to wonder who do I trust there, but then I remember that it's not employees vs. residents..they are all the same. They are equals, though perhaps sometimes not treated as equals.

The hardest thing lately has been working with adult day care goers who can seem completely capable, but have begun to get confused and have lost some memory. Having the same conversation over and over is now a frequent occurrence. It's just on a repeat cycle. I think I told one gentleman five times that I'm mostly German but didn't speak German at home. He simply doesn't remember asking me that question. And even today I was visiting with the sweetest lady and her mind was continually wandering. We would be talking about the flowers and she'd make a comment about her sister marrying someone, and a lot of times the context of her conversation would change mid-sentence!

It has been a huge reality check for me to see these people and realize that someday...that could be me...70-80 seems so far removed from my current 20, but time flies..it will seem like no time passed by the time I get there. I have a lot to learn about life. One resident burst into tears as he told me about his son who has passed away. As I rubbed his shoulder I just thought, what love this man has to share.

Meeting these people has taught me so much. I can see examples of how I want to be, and examples of how I don't want to be. I am faced every day with the very real possibility of losing a friend - a reality that they have known much longer than I have. I don't want to look back on my life with regrets. I want to live everyday for Christ. I want to do my best and be my best. I want to see God's hand in my life, and how He can use me to influence others lives.

Though volunteering at the nursing home has been difficult, I can't regret it. I'm thankful for the experience of learning from those who have experienced way more than I have. I'm thankful for the hard lessons I have learned. I'm thankful for the chance to meet these people and make a difference in their day. I'm thankful for the opportunity to serve. I'm thankful for the strength from God that allows me to be there. 

Inspired Conversation

I didn't have a chance to write on Thursday, so this can count as my thankful thursday, as it did happen on Thursday. :P

My family is having a reunion out in Jersey this weekend, so I was flying out to meet them. Once I made it to my connecting airport, I quickly ran to Arby's for food, then ran back to my gate. As I was eating my food, the man sitting across from me began to tease me about how I didn't bring him something. We chatted a little bit and he teased me throughout of being mean and cruel. Towards the end he asked where I was sitting and that it better not be by him. I didn't learn my seat until after he boarded. As I boarded, I found my row, and then felt a tap on my shoe. It was him. I just gasped "No way!", and he looked incredulous, "That's not possible, show me proof!"

Needless to say, it was possible. I sat down and he introduced himself. I knew this was no coincidence, God had me there for a reason. We talked the entire 2 1/2 hour flight. We learned a lot about each other. He told me funny stories about his kids, and life lessons he's learned. I told him about my year in Germany and how much I learned. I was able to tell him about IBC, my church there, and what a difference it made for me. That led into a long, very detailed discussion about his church - Church of the Latter Day Saints of Jesus Christ.

I am very intrigued by mormons and what they believe, because I've heard of some things, and I wanted to hear them from an actually mormon! I asked him a lot of questions, and he answered them to the best of his ability. He had many literary articles on his phone that he allowed me to read, like their statement of faith. It was a great tool for me to bring new questions into the conversation. He expressed his beliefs, and I expressed mine, and though many of them were different, there was no animosity or hard feelings either way.

I did not change any of his beliefs, and he did not change any of mine, but he inspired me to actually research other religions, find out what they believe and why, so that the next time I have an opportunity like that, I'll know more what we're talking about. :)

I know God had me there for a reason, and I think one reason was to show me areas where my foundation need to be strengthened so I can more easily communicate it to others. And another reason was to open my eyes to some other beliefs that people hold on to. It was very educational for me.

Our conversation ended very well with him hugging me goodbye at the baggage claim. It was a wonderful experience for me, and I'm still very excited about it.

Thankful Thursday - Street Fair!

In my town right now there is a street fair going on. It's where a bunch of vendors come and sell arts and crafts, food and drinks...there's also entertainment! It's really a lot of fun, but that also means that my job is a lot busier.

Today was the first day, and I was a bit nervous to start off. My back and neck hurt a lot, I was dizzy, and I had a headache...there were a few times that I was literally concerned I'd simply fall to the ground. Thankfully, that did not happen. The Lord helped me through the day, and He sent some of my favorite customers to lift my spirits.

I ended up working 9 hours today, and it really was a lot of fun, despite not feeling the best. When I was finished, my boss invited me to go with him to the booth his wife was running and get some smoothies (which were delicious, btw)! I'm so glad I changed my plans in order to do that with him. It was a wonderful time just getting to know him better and being able to share with him some things on my mind and get his opinions. I really loved how there was a mutual respect, even though we disagree on many points. It was such a blessing.

I managed to get to my small group in time for some praying, and was even prayed for! I just feel so...wow.. I can't even explain it. It's one of the feelings of just knowing I was in the right place at the right time..

God is so amazing. He really is. He is using me, and only He deserves the glory. It is so amazing to know that God is real, He's everywhere, He's powerful and mighty, He's wonderful, He's the Savior, He's the King! I just can't wait for Him to continue using me. All my thankful thoughts today are of Christ. He sustains, He gives peace, He fills, He gives wisdom freely to those who ask, He is merciful, He is magnificent. Really, there is no end to the praise that is due His name!

Thankful Thursday - Questions

I nearly forgot it was Thankful Thursday today! I will keep this short tonight, because I still have lots to do and am already very tired. But despite that, I have many things to be thankful for:

~ Air conditioning. It's amazing the weather extremes we have up here!
~ Good friends and co-workers. We had an employee meeting tonight, and it was splendid.
~ Being able to meet up with M's aunt, who I love (*wave* hi!!) for dinner. It was a very uplifting time.
~ Also thinking back to my trip home, I'm extremely thankful for the time with family and friends.
~ Safety driving back from home.
~ Almost being done with a very tiring work week.
~ And for having a really great guy to celebrate with tomorrow!

The other thing on my mind lately is just a ton of questions. Questions of God's will, and how He makes things work. Questions on what is most important. Lots of questions of how to handle different situations. I feel somewhat weighed down by questions right now, and I haven't really gotten any answers yet. I would appreciate your prayers for that. I'm thankful for having friends who will pray for me..you guys are awesome!