If you haven't read Part One - Find it here.
On December 23rd, 2020, we shared on our adoption Facebook page that we made the difficult decision to not renew our home study in March unless we are matched with an expectant mother by the end of February. We specifically asked people to share that post and the response was enormous. To give some comparison: we had an introductory post that we paid Facebook to share far and wide. We would pay to run the ad every weekend for up to forty dollars, and the best that post ever accomplished was eighty-eight shares. I was truly excited and encouraged that paying for the ad had such a great result. However, with our post about our decision to let our time run out, we chose to see how it would do without paying anything to advertise it. Within three days the post was shared one hundred and ten times! Facebook estimates that almost eight thousand people saw it in their personal news feed. These numbers are truly incredible to me. We were completely blown away by the support and hoped it would make all the difference. Sadly, no connection was found through social media.
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| It is still shocking to me that this post reached so many people |
Over the next few weeks, I got to know this agency well as we waited for the mother to make a decision for her child. Ultimately, she chose to parent her baby and I was thrilled for them! Our time was running out now. It seemed our dream was at its end.
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| No one would have known that we'd just received another "no" |
Then late in February, I received a phone call from a friend with a shocking offer. She said that she felt that our journey wasn’t over. If money was standing in the way of us renewing our home study, it would be provided for us. I was dumbfounded by this generous offer.
We’d been trying diligently to walk through the doors that God was opening, and this was no different. We decided to accept the sweet gift and see what He had in store. Recently, our consultant advised us to sign on with agencies in addition to working with her. We decided to sign on with the agency that we’d just gotten to know and love.
Immediately, they informed us that they were working with an expectant couple that they thought might be a good fit for us. It felt too good to be true! When they sent out the official case, we immediately knew that we wanted to present our profile. From time to time, we would tell our family that we were presenting to a potential case, and this was one of those times. We knew we would have some of our best odds ever, and it felt like this might be our time. If we weren’t chosen with these odds, it felt like it would never happen. We asked them to pray.
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| Our profile book introduction |
We sent in our profile knowing that the expectant family would be looking at it around noon. We knew that it could be hours or days before we found out if we were chosen or not. It seems pretty common practice within the adoption world that if you aren’t chosen you’ll receive an email. But, if you are chosen, you’ll get a phone call. I was getting ready to pick up my mom from the airport around 4:00pm, and needed to fill my tank with gas first. I realized that I’d need to go to the cashier to grab my receipt, so I went to grab my car keys and saw that my phone was ringing. It was our consultant! My heart felt like it fell out of my body.
I rushed to answer my phone before I missed her and heard her immediately ask if my husband was nearby. Inside my head I was screaming, “There is only one reason she can be calling! This can’t be real.” She said the words I truly doubted I would ever hear, “The expectant mom chose you!” Right there in the gas station, I burst into tears as I confirmed that this was truly happening. To wait for three and a half years, constantly feeling that we weren’t what any expectant couple wanted to suddenly feeling seen by someone I’d never met! I will never forget that moment.
As soon as I got back into my car I got to make the best phone call to my husband. Was this real life? I still needed to drive to the airport in the middle of my shaking and randomly bursting into tears. My husband sent a text out to our family group message. “WE ARE CHOSEN!”
My phone started erupting with messages that I couldn’t wait to read! I called one of my dearest friends with the happiest news and she celebrated in shock with me. Knowing that I was soon to see my mom, I dedicated my time driving to the airport to calling my three sisters to discuss our excitement. Each conversation began with a shared scream of joy. My sisters all had the same sense of overwhelming excitement. This is real, right? We even had a few family members send a text confirming that Mark was not joking. He quickly responded that this truly was happening and we finally had the news we’d been hoping for for years.
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| Just the beginning of the text message celebration |
I was still shaking intensely and couldn’t help jumping in joy when I first saw my mom. She was the very first person I got to hug after hearing the amazing news. She and I were both speechless for several minutes. She took over driving, thankfully, and I was finally able to see the massive celebration from our extended family. This was the moment we had all prayed for, but weren’t confident would happen. It was incredible.
Two days later we received our first text from the expectant mother. I was so nervous to talk with her and the expectant father. They quickly put us at ease with amazing conversations about their likes and dislikes, family ancestry, and their desires for their baby. It was amazing all around. We quickly learned how many things we had in common and some of the reasons that they had chosen us. It was the most incredible time. And yet, it was such a confusing emotion to sit in. We longed for this to be our child, but how could we wish that decision on anyone?
When the day finally came that we got to meet the expectant mom at our home, we were beyond excited and nervous. Would it be awkward? Would she still choose us? Would she decide that we weren’t what she was looking for in parents for her little one?
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